7 Ways To Show Love Without Words (That Will Make Him Fall For You)
Saying "I love you" is an excellent way to show someone you care about them.
But sometimes words are not enough.
Here, seven experts explain how to show your love without using words:"When we are compassionate with the people we love, we give them permission to be flawed and vulnerable. Whether it is through a kind word, an act of service, or simply a hug or shoulder to lean on, our compassion for our spouse makes them feel loved in a way that is often difficult to express in words." -Esther Boykin, LMFT
"Men show love without words by problem-solving for their spouse, fixing things, doing things for them. Women would appreciate gifts or having things done for them. And women often show their love by buying their spouse something or making them a nice meal." -Melodies Tucker
"Being that 75 percent of our communication is non-verbal, learning to direct your non-verbal messages where you want them can not only help you to avoid toxic conflict, but it can actually bring you closer to your partner. Using posture, facial expressions, sweet gestures or even a "secret" handshake can communicate everything you want to your sweetie. Take care to be conscious of these things and you'll be surprised at the results. - Cory B Honickman
"Leave love notes around the house in surprising places where they will find them. Run then a hot bath, add rose petals and lighted candles. Give them a foot or back massage. Make them their favorite meal. Let them control the TV remote all evening." -Crystal Dawn Morris
"Knowing what your partner needs to feel loved. With some, it's touch: holding hands, hugging, kissing. For others, it's care and nurture, which might be buying a favorite food or drink, making a special meal, or cleaning out her car." -Sally Connolly
"And don't fake it. You may be unaware of those subtle (or not so subtle!) signs that show that even though you're really trying to listen, you're actually feeling inconvenienced or bored, or you'd rather be doing something else. But your companion or loved one will pick up on that and feel hurt." -Tricia Berry, CPC
"One of the best ways to show our love is by receiving love. To open yourself up, to allow yourself to graciously receive is a tremendous gift to the one giving. When someone says, 'I love you' or opens a door for you, smile and simply say, 'Thank you.' Notice how you feel, then return the favor (or pay it forward)!" - Jessy Servia the number 1 secret to making him love you click on this linkhttps://tinyurl.com/mrxyt29v
5 Ways You Subconsciously Close Your Heart To Love
One of the most surprising revelations I had is when the still, small voice inside of me said that I was using makeup as a way of not allowing myself to be vulnerable. What? Like, my foundation is keeping my partner away?
It was the start of summer, and I was walking along the ocean, praying for guidance as far as how to release the blocks in my relationship. The still, small voice responded, You think you need to look perfect. You think that if you look perfect, someone will love you. You’re unwilling to show the real you. You think you need to earn love.
The truth was that I was a perfectionist, and I did rush to apply makeup after getting out of the shower. Thinking I needed to look and be perfect in order to be worthy of love was an unconscious script that I was unaware of up until that moment.
When you are in a relationship or dating, there are two scripts running in tandem: the conscious thoughts you’re aware of, and the unconscious thoughts and fears that drive you, but you don’t realize this until you get quiet and look inward.
In other words: You’re closing your heart to potential partners in ways that you can’t even imagine and self-sabotaging relationships. Your inability to be vulnerable and let people in manifests in quirky ways that are easy to miss if you’re not present.
Your past. Your family. Your dreams. The list goes on and on.
You expect your partner, or date, to be open and honest, but there are certain topics that are off the table, as far as you’re concerned. You’ll open up about work, or your friendships, but when your date asks about your family, you say it’s complicated.
You have a secret dream of being a singer, but you don’t trust your partner enough to tell him. You had a horrible day, but when your partner calls, you fake a pleasant tone and tell him that everything is fine.
Every time you are unwilling to share something with your partner, or potential partner, it creates distance in your relationship. If you want an emotionally mature relationship, you have to be willing to open your heart, which means sharing your truths.
This is not to say you should turn your first date into a confession, but rather, that when the instinct to close your heart and shut down arises, ask yourself if not sharing that thing will bring you closer to this person, or create even more distance.
It’s easy to tell your partner how great he is, but it requires a whole other level of spiritual and emotional maturity to tell him that you’re experiencing feelings of frustration or anger because of something that he did or said. It can feel unsafe to share negative emotions, and while it’s easy to talk to other people — your mom, best friend, or co-worker — it takes a lot more maturity to discuss issues with your date, or partner.
Out of habit, you don’t share when you’re upset, and because of this, resentment starts to build within you. You close your heart. Your partner reaches over to hug you and you pull away. You send a curt text. He asks if anything is bothering you, and you reply, No. I’m fine.
Here’s the key: the moment you want to shut down and withhold your feelings is the exact moment that you need to become aware of this pattern and break it. Speak up, and do it in a loving, calm way; this is how you can deepen the connection you have with your partner.
A cute coworker passes by your desk, and you bat your eyelashes and wonder why you chose to wear cement-colored slacks and an ill-fitting sweater. You put out flirtatious energy because people say it’s not only harmless, it’s natural.
You don’t think about the fact that most people are in unhappy relationships, and maybe you should stop doing what most people do. You say you want a committed relationship, but you still have your feelers out; not in an overt way, but in subtle ways.
You look around the bar on Friday evening, when your partner’s not there, and some voice in your mind whispers, He’s cute. This is not to say that you’re never going to find other people attractive, but rather, that it would serve your relationship to become aware of the energy you’re putting out.
Are you sending out messages to other people that you’re interested in? Do you enjoy it when other people flirt with you because it boosts your confidence? Does some part of you still want to leave your options open?
If there’s an energy in you that’s seeking elsewhere, it is creating distance in your relationship in subtle ways. Don’t think that because your partner doesn’t know that it’s “innocent” or “harmless.” The energy you put out comes right back to you.
Part of you believes that physical intimacy will make someone love you. You’re unaware of the fear that drives you to be intimate so quickly, and you think it’s normal because all of your friends are just as quick to get physical.
You need to check your intentions: Are you being intimate, because you’re afraid of losing the person? Are you doing it to please your partner and because you think it’s normal to get physical by a certain number of dates, or after a certain amount of time?
If you’re getting closer to someone physically, because you’re trying to fit in or please the other person, you’re actually not experiencing true intimacy. When two people are truly intimate, they share a deep connection that goes beyond the physical, but that can be expressed physically.
Real intimacy takes time and trust. If you’re intimate before you’re ready, you’ll unconsciously resent your partner, and you won’t feel safe or loved.
You’re only willing to partially open your heart to someone new because you are still connected to your ex. You feel that you have a close bond, and you turn to your ex to discuss problems, share a laugh, or celebrate the good news that you’ve received. You’re unwilling to completely let go of your ex, and so there’s no space for a new partner.
In order to manifest an emotionally healthy and mature relationship, you must release your past. This doesn’t mean that you can never communicate with your ex, but rather, that you should honor what’s in your present, and that might mean spending less time and energy with your ex.
Once you become aware of the ways you might be closing your heart, you can catch yourself as you fall into negative patterns, and you can begin to shift. It only requires the tiniest amount of self-awareness and the decision to make a change to open your heart. With these two things, you can shift your dating and romantic life and manifest a connected, mature relationship.
Jessie Leon writes about mindful living, relationships, and spirit. She has been in featured in Elephant Journal, Evie Magazine, and more.
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Author Explains MLK Jr.’s Secret To Success
HOUSTON — As we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day, author Thomas Fellows discusses one of Dr. King’s quotes about service.
“Everybody can be great…because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.”
Fellows says the quote is so impactful because the book by David Brooks called “The Road to Character”, which Fellows uses in his own books, talks about the difference between Resume virtues and Eulogy virtues.
Resume virtues are those such as money, power, and status, while eulogy virtues are about making the world a better place. Too often Fellows says, in high school and college, we focus on resume virtues in college or high school. But focusing on eulogy virtues will get you far in the world if you use them correctly.
Fellows talks about the time he sold bottled water in his hometown of Atlanta. He was, and is, customer-obsessed. He would typically ice down the water ahead of time so they were nice and cold. He would sell them for $1 but purchase them for 25 cents at the local Kroger.
He would have catchy sayings such as “the night is hot but the water is not”. He remembers a time he ran out of ice and ran to the golf course which is probably about a 3.2-mile hike, just to keep the water cold.
According to Fellows, an important part of business is being customer obsessed, and sometimes giving the advantage to the other person works out well. When you serve the customer they will be coming back and are a lifetime value to that business.
ServiceNow CEO Bill McDermott began his managerial career at the age of 24Fellows adds it is rare when people go out of their way to serve. In the end, don’t expect to get anything back when you serve because people are usually in it for themselves. Fellows takes the approach of being someone’s number-one cheerleader and says that has worked well for him because people see him as an encouraging person.
He says you can’t be one unless you’re secure with yourself first.
